Tiny Delusional Love Stories
A Slow Climb to Forever
Martin and I met on a group trip to Peru. We climbed Machu Picchu with nine other people but only had eyes for each other. He also glanced at Jess occasionally, took selfies with her, held her hair when she puked from altitude sickness, and then slept in her tent just to make her feel better. Such a caring guy! He hasn’t asked me out yet, but that’s only because he’s really shy and wants to take things slow.
’NSync From the Start
Claire and I were “in synch” from the moment we met at a friend’s birthday party where I watched her dance to “Bye Bye Bye.” She left that night with Chris, but I knew that he wasn’t the right man for her. Just as I suspected, she came right back to me after he dumped her six months later. Then she met Jacob, but that didn’t work out either, because I’m her soulmate. And now we are inseparable, every time one of her relationships ends.
Partners on the Treadmill of Life
Rob and I met in a running club. I cried when he shared deeply personal childhood stories with me. I mean, he didn’t reveal them to me himself—I scoured the Internet to find his high-school blog. But I just know that he wrote it for me so I could truly know him before he even knew I existed. He says that he doesn’t want to date, but that’s because of his lifelong avoidant attachment style, and I won’t let him run away from his past and our future.
Kale You Believe It?
It all started at Whole Foods, when Jen and I reached for the same bunch of kale and then the water mister came on and sprayed us—how we laughed! I asked for her number and the rest is history. We text non-stop. Well, most of the time. Sometimes she leaves me on “read.” Occasionally, it takes her days or weeks to respond. Actually, a year has gone by since her last text, but it’s all part of the long game. She knows I love games. Almost as much as we both love kale.
Coffee Lovers
Every day, I go to my neighborhood coffee shop, and Alice is there, offering up her bright smile and a chipper “good morning.” We have a running joke that she never remembers my name. Yesterday, I looked down, and there was a foamy heart in my coffee. I asked her out on the spot. She claimed that foam hearts are required for all twelve-ounce lattes, and that it didn’t mean anything, but I know what I saw. I’m going to ask her out again tomorrow. And the next day, and the next.
The Ride of a Lifetime
When Patrick gave me a ride home from the club, he wouldn’t stop talking the whole time. That’s how comfortable he felt with me! And when he dropped me off at my doorstep, he didn’t even try anything! Such a gentleman. I don’t know exactly how Uber works on the back end, but he can get my number, right? I’m sure he’ll call soon.
Rubbing Elbows with Love
She chose to sit next to me when there were plenty of other open seats. Our arms brushed on the armrest and I got goosebumps. I laughed sheepishly and made a joke about having two left elbows. She joked back by putting on her eye mask and noise-cancelling headphones—it was so cute. I’ll ask her if she wants to come meet my parents when we get to Cincinnati.
The True Spirit of Love
Katie didn’t like me when we first met. She was angry that I’d moved into her childhood home. She would flicker the lights, burst the pipes, and howl all night in an attempt to drive me out. But then, one day, we discovered our mutual love of the New York Times’ “Modern Love” column and everything changed. I like to say that ours wasn’t “love at first sight”—and not just because Katie has no corporeal form. I submitted our love story to the Times on our twentieth anniversary. I can’t wait to imagine the look of surprise on Katie’s face when she sees it in print! ♦
"Love" - Google News
July 16, 2023 at 05:00PM
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Tiny Delusional Love Stories - The New Yorker
"Love" - Google News
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