Such is my lack of esteem for Hollywood and much of the film industry that I initially assumed when Will Smith dope-slapped Chris Rock in the middle of the Academy Awards it was staged, a pathetic attempt to gin up ratings for the awards show that have been tanking for a decade.
Alas, it was even more pathetic. It was real.
It is possible to hold two reasonable positions on this most Hollywood of scandals. That Chris Rock was out of line, making fun of Smith’s wife, Jada Pinkett-Smith, based on a physical condition, alopecia, that causes hair loss. And that Smith was way out of line to respond to that offense by walking on stage and sucker slapping Rock in the face before a live television audience of millions.
While some cheered Smith on, claiming his response proved that chivalry was not dead, common sense apparently is.
Massachusetts congresswoman Ayanna Pressley heaped praise on Smith, tweeting, “#Alopecia nation stand up! Thank you #WillSmith. Shout out to all the husbands who defend their wives living with alopecia in the face of daily ignorance & insults.”
Given that Pressley is living with alopecia, her immediate, visceral response was understandable.
That she deleted the tweet suggests she quickly realized a member of Congress praising someone who resorted to violence in objecting to a joke told in bad taste is not a good look.
Another part of Pressley’s tweet, accompanied by a photo of her with her husband, Conan Harris, noted that, “Women with baldies are for real men only. Boys need not apply.”
If her initial shoutout to Smith is not an endorsement of the same toxic masculinity that Pressley and other members of Congress rightly call out in other contexts, I don’t know what it is. Using terms like “real men” in the context of someone who used violence in the supposed defense of his wife in the face of a tasteless attempt at humor or even an insult seems to be the antithesis of so much of Pressley’s political agenda.
I reached out to Pressley’s office, requesting an interview but was declined. She later tweeted, “I don’t endorse violence in any form,” and noted she is a survivor of violence.
Pressley has been brave in calling attention to alopecia, proudly shedding a wig to fight the stigma.
But there should be a stigma attached to people who respond to objectionable speech with violence.
There was no justification for Smith’s actions. Real men can settle their differences with words, not fists. Smith could have used his platform to say that making fun of medical conditions and disabilities is wrong, whether you’re a stand-up comic or a president.
Still, there may be something much deeper going on. In his 2021 memoir, “Will,” Smith wrote about growing up watching his father beat his mother.
“When I was nine years old,” he wrote, “I watched my father punch my mother in the side of the head so hard that she collapsed. I saw her spit blood. That moment, in that bedroom, probably more than any other moment in my life, has defined who I am.”
That violence had a profound effect on him.
“Within everything that I have done since then - the awards and accolades, the spotlights and attention, the characters and the laughs - there has been a subtle string of apologies to my mother for my inaction that day. For failing her in the moment. For failing to stand up to my father. For being a coward.”
Smith wrote that after his father was confined to a wheelchair with heart disease, he considered pushing him down a flight of stairs.
Presumably there was a lot going on in Will Smith’s head when he climbed the stage and confronted Chris Rock.
If many people who watched the assault in real time were disturbed by it, they apparently got over it quickly, giving him a standing ovation after Smith won Best Actor for his role in “King Richard.” Smith apologized to the academy, but not to Rock, saying he felt duty-bound to defend his family.
“Love will make you do crazy things,” he said.
So will narcissism, arrogance, and an impulsive lapse of judgment.
Kevin Cullen is a Globe columnist. He can be reached at kevin.cullen@globe.com.
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