90 Day Fiancé's Riley Won't Say 'I Love You' to Violet - PEOPLE

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Riley has a unique way of showing his love for girlfriend Violet on 90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days. 

The American man has been adamant he'll never use the “L” word. Instead, he'd taken to giving Violet the finger to signify his affection. 

"I don’t say 'I love you.' I don’t ever say 'I love you,'" he said. "'Cause whenever I say I love you to a person, they leave.” So, he began to improvise, flipping the bird to his long-distance lover. “It started because Violet told me women in Vietnam mean the opposite of what they say. So when she says she hates me, it actually means ‘I like you.’” 

The lack of “love” in Riley’s life stemmed from several bad experiences — including a cheating ex. Once he found his friend hiding in his ex-girlfriend’s closet, all bets were off — and the word “love” was erased from his vocabulary. “I try to be more trusting and let people in, but I always get hurt,” he shared.

But Riley had found something special — if not "love" — with Violet, a 43-year-old mom living in Vietnam. Though the pair had yet to meet in person, Riley was gearing up to fly across the world and maybe even plan a future with Violet if the chemistry felt right. 

Still, he had some concerns. Specifically, he told his friends during Sunday’s episode that Violet had attempted to “hide” her divorcée statue from him — only to slip up when she announced her divorce had been finalized. 

And there was also that time Riley found Violet on a dating app after they'd already committed to each other. “She was so adamant that I come off the dating app, and I did it,” he told his friends. "When this whole thing blew up, I went to check if she was still on it, and she was." 

Despite it all, it was clear the couple had loving feelings for one another — even if Riley couldn't utter the words — and they were intent on deepening their relationship and future together. 

Comparing Violet to his relationships, Riley admitted he saw a difference. “Violet is the sweetest jerk I’ve ever met in my life,” he said. “She’s hilarious. She’s very clever with her jokes. She’ll say something real slick — it’s like a joke grenade. It’ll take me like three seconds for it to explode.”

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90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days airs Sundays at 8 p.m. ET on TLC.

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90 Day Fiancé's Riley Won't Say 'I Love You' to Violet - PEOPLE
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